I’m waiting for a jet engine to fall into my bedroom

The next few paragraphs are nothing but me bitching.  So……..yeah.
My really shitty day for today actually started last Thursday.  I started getting really bad stomach pains.  Now, a cramp is more tolerable than Pain.  For instance, a cramp is like……it’s like what we used to call as kids an “Indian Rugburn”.  Pain is like someone twisting your arm until the skin comes off, then the muscle and tendons, and then proceeding to break your arm.  And then setting you on fire.
Anyway, those of you who know me know that I have a decently high tolerance for pain, so, I’m not going to get into that at the moment.  However, the second time the Pain came, on Saturday, it was………..like that scene in Alien, where the chest burster came out.  Well, I felt like I had one of those, but, rather than chewing its’ way out, it was just kind of rubbing really fucking hard to get out.  It knocked the breath out of me.
So, I’ve been dealing with it for the last few days, planning on going to the doctor’s office on Monday.  Because, like a normal human being, my doctor deserves the weekend off.
But, it wasn’t to be.  My night started off slow, with me being ridiculously annoyed by the goddamned cricket in the den (we have wooden floors, so everything echoes).  I didn’t get  to sleep until 11 anyway, and I’d worked yesterday   Then……….4am, I was woken up from a decent dream by absolute searing pain.  I writhed silently for a few minutes (because it was 4am, and I didn’t think my dad would appreciate a whiney adult kid at 4am.).  Then, I tried to go back to sleep.  I did sleep again, but was again woken up by Brodie………..at 6:30am.  Because he wants cheerios.  Before anyone else is freaking awake.  After valiantly attempting to get him to go back to sleep, I got up and gave him breakfast.  By this time, the Pain started to get more and more steady, and I decided to forego church and stay home and read the Bible on my own.
By the time Caitlin got home at 11:30ish, I couldn’t deal with it anymore.  I was so glad when my parents got home a little after 12……..because, well, after they left for church, my mom called my cell to tell me that my tire was flat.  Not just low.  F-L-A-T.  And I couldn’t drive myself (good thing, so I’ll get to that in a minute).
So, my dad takes me to the E.R.  And I got in pretty quickly.  I was a good little patient, I peed in my cup, I got poked and prodded (down monkeys!), gave about 2 pints of blood for labwork, and then the doctor came in and proceeded to push on my stomach for about 10 minutes.  See, I know that he’s got to do it to see whether or not I’ve got an abnormal growth or maybe I swallowed a severed head or something…….but, HOT DAMN, that hurt!
By the time he left, I was in tears.  So, he sends his nurse back with Morphine.  Now, not that I mind the pain relief, but I don’t like the fog it leaves my head in.  Anyway, I am actually glad for it……..because about 1/2 hour after that, I got an ultrasound to check for anything wrong inside.  And HOLY SHIT did she ever push on my stomach.
So, what’s wrong with me?  I have gall stones, so I have to get my gall bladder out.  LO-VE-LY. Like I can afford to spend any time off work.  *sigh*  Why they couldn’t just keep me there and do it NOW, rather than send me home with pain meds that leave me in a fog (and give me weird nightmares), I’ll never know, but I have to set up an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow.  *sigh*
Well, at least I’m alive, and will most likely survive the removal of an organ that is semi-useless.  Not as useless as the appendix, but less useful than the heart.
But, you know, you’d THINK that FOX would show something other than STAR WARS on a night when I need to be lying in bed.