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The next few paragraphs are nothing but me bitching.  So……..yeah.
My really shitty day for today actually started last Thursday.  I started getting really bad stomach pains.  Now, a cramp is more tolerable than Pain.  For instance, a cramp is like……it’s like what we used to call as kids an “Indian Rugburn”.  Pain is like someone twisting your arm until the skin comes off, then the muscle and tendons, and then proceeding to break your arm.  And then setting you on fire.
Anyway, those of you who know me know that I have a decently high tolerance for pain, so, I’m not going to get into that at the moment.  However, the second time the Pain came, on Saturday, it was………..like that scene in Alien, where the chest burster came out.  Well, I felt like I had one of those, but, rather than chewing its’ way out, it was just kind of rubbing really fucking hard to get out.  It knocked the breath out of me.
So, I’ve been dealing with it for the last few days, planning on going to the doctor’s office on Monday.  Because, like a normal human being, my doctor deserves the weekend off.
But, it wasn’t to be.  My night started off slow, with me being ridiculously annoyed by the goddamned cricket in the den (we have wooden floors, so everything echoes).  I didn’t get  to sleep until 11 anyway, and I’d worked yesterday :(   Then……….4am, I was woken up from a decent dream by absolute searing pain.  I writhed silently for a few minutes (because it was 4am, and I didn’t think my dad would appreciate a whiney adult kid at 4am.).  Then, I tried to go back to sleep.  I did sleep again, but was again woken up by Brodie………..at 6:30am.  Because he wants cheerios.  Before anyone else is freaking awake.  After valiantly attempting to get him to go back to sleep, I got up and gave him breakfast.  By this time, the Pain started to get more and more steady, and I decided to forego church and stay home and read the Bible on my own.
By the time Caitlin got home at 11:30ish, I couldn’t deal with it anymore.  I was so glad when my parents got home a little after 12……..because, well, after they left for church, my mom called my cell to tell me that my tire was flat.  Not just low.  F-L-A-T.  And I couldn’t drive myself (good thing, so I’ll get to that in a minute).
So, my dad takes me to the E.R.  And I got in pretty quickly.  I was a good little patient, I peed in my cup, I got poked and prodded (down monkeys!), gave about 2 pints of blood for labwork, and then the doctor came in and proceeded to push on my stomach for about 10 minutes.  See, I know that he’s got to do it to see whether or not I’ve got an abnormal growth or maybe I swallowed a severed head or something…….but, HOT DAMN, that hurt!
By the time he left, I was in tears.  So, he sends his nurse back with Morphine.  Now, not that I mind the pain relief, but I don’t like the fog it leaves my head in.  Anyway, I am actually glad for it……..because about 1/2 hour after that, I got an ultrasound to check for anything wrong inside.  And HOLY SHIT did she ever push on my stomach.
So, what’s wrong with me?  I have gall stones, so I have to get my gall bladder out.  LO-VE-LY. Like I can afford to spend any time off work.  *sigh*  Why they couldn’t just keep me there and do it NOW, rather than send me home with pain meds that leave me in a fog (and give me weird nightmares), I’ll never know, but I have to set up an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow.  *sigh*
Well, at least I’m alive, and will most likely survive the removal of an organ that is semi-useless.  Not as useless as the appendix, but less useful than the heart.
But, you know, you’d THINK that FOX would show something other than STAR WARS on a night when I need to be lying in bed.

You scored as One Intelectual Individual. You’re a thinker. You see things from a very different prospective than the rest of the world, and probably find release and self-expression in music, painting, scalpting, or any other form of art. People see you as a deep person, full of knowledge that they don’t understand. People are attracted to that, but there’s a good chance you don’t care.

One Intelectual Individual
 
88%
New Age Hippie
 
75%
Original Hippie
 
75%
Earth-Child
 
75%
Not a Hippie
 
63%
Pothead
 
25%

What type of hippie are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

See, I always knew I was cooler than you!

I can do all kinds of stupid shit, and someone still thinks I’m funny.

Today hasn’t been the greatest day ever. Like the title says, I shouldn’t have even gotten out of bed.

Last night, after getting home from work, I was informed that Brodie had lost my Wacom pen. Not usually a big deal, after being at work, but, well, today, it was. Today was my Day off™ for the week, and I wanted to get working on this character. Well, no such freaking luck. I’ve cleaned, even dusted, my room…….nothing. *sigh* I really can’t afford $50 for a new pen. I may have to take my mom’s tablet back :(

And, then, I took my sister to the high school to check out the marching band. Which is usually not a big deal.

But, on the way home, swerving to miss both a car and a huge animal (it was either a possum or a woodchuck…I’m not big on my wild animals at the moment), I crashed onto the side of the road……..and got stuck on a big ass log that was laid there by the road commission when they trimmed the trees. TWO MONTHS AGO. I broke the grill, the left hand headlight is askew, and the right hand mirror is shattered. And everything that was under and behind my seat is now all over the inside of my truck.

Actually, I think the only nice thing that went on in my day is the few messages I shared with Ryan, and the time Brodie walked up to me and asked how I was doing, and I thought he asked “What the Hell are you doing??”

So, because I can’t do anything right, and I keep just fucking up all day long………I’m now going to bed. Hopefully, nothing goes wrong tomorrow.

About this time last night (it’s currently 10:25pm), I watched one of my best friends drive off into the night in a little red convertible (that barely contained her beautiful gown) to her new life.  It was the perfect end to a beautiful wedding and reception, and I don’t think anyone anywhere will find or see such a beautiful pair as Ashley and Leah Fox.  Leah was a beautiful, not-so-much blushing Bride, and Ashley was a beaming, happy, and very-much-so blushing Groom.  The ceremony was perfect.  The sky was a little overcast, but it was welcome after the ridiculous heatwave we’ve had lately.  I, of course, like the big suck I am, cried through the whole ceremony.  She was a beautiful bride.  Have I mentioned that 12 times yet?  Because I should.  Many more times.  I also should have brought a camera.

Should I start at the beginning?  I should.  I will.

It started out hellaciously akward.  I know I told Jared and Susie that I didn’t notice them, but I did.  Right after I noticed that Chris was doing the sound.  I didn’t get up and go say hi, because of this inherent fear that everyone hates me.  See, while I’m totally secure in my bitchtitude, a friends’ wedding is NOT the place to wear it as a banner.  Besides, I wasn’t always just a snarky, bitter bitch.  I used to just be a snarky bitch.  Writing such brilliant essays with titles like “Girls are Stupid” and “101 reasons why it sucks to be a Girl”.  And other classy gems.

Anyway, back to the wedding.  I was actually hoping that they’d notice me, and either confirm their non-hatred, or confirm their hatred.  But, one of Leah’s brothers put them two rows behind me.  No big.  (By the way, should anyone read this, I’m just venting my total insecurities.  I’m well aware that I’m one of the only people that reads this, even though I link to it from everywhere.  Including my email.)  Luckily, they stationed one of the guys I considered my best friend in my class, Jeff.  He makes me laugh so much.  He made it bearable, and said one thing to me that was totally true.  There’s nothing like a wedding to make a lonely person miserable.  At least he had the wherewithall to dance at the reception.  I, on the other hand, had to leave to go buy cigarettes.  Because, in the face of adversity, I’d rather smoke a cigarette than cry in public.  Even though I’d been doing it all night.

Anyway, I haven’t even gotten through any of this, LOL.  Leah’s little 1st cousin was the flower girl, and I believe a little guy on Ashley’s side was ring bearer.  They were freakin’ adorable.  There was a string quartet that played the music at the wedding (and Chris was the DJ at the reception), and there were 2 singers…one, I believe, has been in plays at the Croswell…and the other was a friend of theirs from College.  Regardless, it was beautiful.  There were a few times when there were laughs (like when Ashley almost forgot “Respect” in their official vows, and Leah, of course, reminded him out loud :) ), and most of the time, I was in tears.  I don’t even know why I wear makeup outside the house anymore.  I’m bound to cry.  Con.Stant.Ly.

Anyway, the wedding was gorgeous.  Then, we went inside, and sat, and there, I greeted Jared and Susie, and the other people (who I have forgotten already because I’d never met them before, and, well, frankly, I was jumping outside my bubble at this point, so I was almost constantly on the verge of a panic attack), and we talked and had fun, and kinda caught up.  Not completely, but kinda.   They had fun, danced, I watched, ran to the bathroom to try to bawl in private, realized that that was the LEAST private place in the building, ran out to my truck, drove down the street to the store, bought a pack of cigarettes, and had one.  And bawled.  Then, came back, and saw it through ’till the end.  Which was about 15 minutes after I got back.

Afterward, me, Jeff, Jared, Susie, Lisa, Elizabeth(?), Chris, and his wife (I apologize, I don’t remember her name.  Or her face.  She’s pretty, though) went to Big Boy for coffee.

And, then, I came home.

And, here it is, a day later.  And, I haven’t cried about it in hours.

However, I am listening to the awesometastic cover of “Bitches Ain’t Shit” by Dr. Dre covered by Ben Folds Five.

If this ain’t happiness, I don’t know what is.  Now, if you’ll pass the bottle of rum, I have a Coke that needs company.